If I'm Being Honest...

I've been a grumpy mom today.

Whew, it feels good to admit it :).

The kids laugh and play and chase each other loudly around the house. I adore them but it's just one of those days when I'm stressed. You know the days.

The day to day doesn't always paint a pretty picture of this beautiful calling, but it seems that the mommy days that teach lessons and make history in your book are the ones that take the most work.

It's that unexpected bill and that relentless child and some decisions we're trying to make and the fact that the housework isn't going the way I want.

When do I stop and remember that my focus should be on what He wants in my home, not what I want in my home?

Messy floors and wet beach towels and playdoh under the kitchen table are all signs of a full life. Full of wonder and joy and people I don't deserve. Full of energy and love and exhausting memories.

Charlotte sits and reads to the younger girls, the others are playing and things are quiet for a minute. Calm and peaceful just for a moment so I can catch my breath and remember that this calling is full of crazy and full of grace. Lincoln sits at my feet in the kitchen as I stir of pot of mac and cheese and my mommy spirit is refreshed...

Oh, Lord let me remember these sweet moments in my frustrated times. Help me remember that they are little once and You are always in control and that Your plan is best. Remind me that my worst days are the days You teach me most and sometimes you have to hit a mommy low to remember the mommy high.

If everyday was perfect then you'd have no need for Jesus. Motherhood is a journey of abundant joy, growing pains, and a constant need for Him.

And so I go and kneel by their beds and kiss those worn out babes. I pray to be the mom tomorrow that I wanted to be today.

Patient and attentive and not so busy with my own things.

Tired but thankful tonight that He uses motherhood to mold us. Thankful for those 6 gifts and the chapters He has waiting for us. Thankful for his mercies that are new every morning.

And thankful that He doesn't ask for me to be the perfect mom, He just wants me to be their mom.

Those sweet kiddos can be exhausting, but He always refuels your mommy heart just when you need it :).