Friday, February 11, 2011

You're A Friend That Would Help Me Move A Body

That's not exactly what you would expect to see on the front of a greeting card, is it?

At Blissdom this year, we were so fortunate to have a speaker by the name of Brene Brown, who spoke so boldly, and honestly about friendship and being vulnerable - a topic that has been heavy on my heart for quite some time.

I'm trying to offer as much as I can (which isn't much at times) to my girlfriends, and I'm trying my hardest to invest in the ladies that make my life richer. It's hard sometimes. My days of hanging out at the last minute, and chatting on the phone several times a day have waved goodbye. (Almost) 6 kiddos consume most of my hours - it's crazy, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Although I would like to shower without all the banging on the door. You know, at some point.

At Blissdom, Brene talked about how everyone needs those few friends that would help you "move a body". Even though it sounds strange at first...and illegal :), I knew immediately who those girls were in my life as her story and reasoning behind that statement unfolded. I felt like God used her to help clarify things that had been on my heart for quite some time, and I felt convicted that I often take those girls for granted while I try to figure out other friendships that are clearly off in a ditch somewhere.

Here is some of the story she told...

"A year or two ago, my good friend called and as soon as I said, “Hello!” she said, “You’re a friend who would move a body.”

I could tell by her voice that she was serious. I lowered my voice and asked, “What does that mean?”

She said that one of her sister’s close friends had called her sister and asked her to help her move her mom. Her mother, who was apparently only invited to visit once a year, struggled with alcoholism. When my sister’s friend came home from work, she was passed out drunk on the sofa. It was 3 o’clock in the afternoon and the kids would be busting through the front door any minute. She called because she physically needed help moving her mother.

I let out a deep sigh and said, “Yes. You could definitely call me.”

Then she said one of the kindest things that anyone has ever said to me.  She explained,

“I’d call you because you would come right away. Give me a hug. Never look judgmental or disapproving or disgusted.

And then you’d say, ‘let’s do this.’

The next day when you saw my mom at the park or the soccer game, you’d be kind and respectful. And most of all, it would never cross my mind to say something to you like, ‘please don’t tell anyone.’ You don’t do that.”

I thought about that conversation for days. I thought about how lucky I am to have a couple of “move-a-body” friends in my life. I thought about how crazy it is that most of us can steamroll over these friends while we work to win the approval and acceptance of people who really don’t matter in our lives – people whom we’d NEVER call when we were in real struggle."

I thought there was so much truth to what she had to say, it was such a great reminder to stay focused on the important relationships in my life, and to be that "move-a-body" friend to my close girlfriends that God has placed by my side.

So anyway, I thought it was worth sharing, she really hit home with a lot of ladies in Nashville.

Hope you all had a great week!

17 comments:

Amber said...

this was such a great reminder to nurture those friendships and to be that friend! and stop wasting time on the relationships that are off in a ditch...

cowartclan said...

I have 2 special " move a body " friends. Thank you for the reminder to cherish them. Friends like these 2 are gifts from God. Thank you!

tabby said...

Another great post. Loved it!

The Sneaky Mommy said...

I love this! While we learn as moms how to handle (or avoid) the fickle, empty friendships that have no redemptive qualities, I'm so apprehensive for my little girl to have to walk that road of learning. Praying God will bring special, close friends into her life that continually point her to God!

Momma of The B.M.C. Report said...

Love this post, Kate!

Jenn said...

Wow! This was great! Thanks so much for sharing this! I think I need to make some phone calls! :)

*Ross and Katy* said...

I love this! I only have two or three "move body" friends-but I wouldn't trade them for the world :)

wonderchris said...

If you ever need to move a body and you find yourself in Oregon...give me a call! :)

A truly beautiful post.

Amy said...

A few weeks ago at Apex Rob was talking about the 4 men that carried the paralyzed man to Jesus and lowered him through the roof. He said, "You need 4 good friends that will carry your mat when you need them to." I immediately thought of who my 4 friends that carry my mat for me when I need them to. So blessed to have these friendships!

Marisa said...

Thank goodness for move-a-body friends! They keep me sane and point me to Jesus!

Lisa Jackson said...

Aw that's such a great story Kate! And thank you for being that "move a body" friend!! Love you and appreciate you always!!

Lisa

susan said...

I just spent two nights having a road trip with one of my "move the body" friends..... she came with me to see my son. How sweet of her to take two days out of her life to solely support me.

Great story :)

Sarah Halstead said...

I love this. What a great story. Thanks for sharing.

jenny said...

Great post! Sounds like it was a very challenging speaker. Thanks for sharing...."move a body" friends really are a gift from Jesus....sometimes the most tangible way we see His encouragement is through those friends! Love ya!

Sarah said...

great reminder - thank you so much for sharing!

Jessica said...

I love...love...LOVE this!! Thanks for sharing!!

Mary @ Giving Up On Perfect said...

I'm so thankful to have move-a-body friends in my life, too. And honestly, I have one friend who would probably help move a body, even if it WAS something illegal! Brene's presentation - this part of it, that is - really challenged me to think am I the kind of friend who would move a body? I certainly hope my close friends know I'm that loyal and willing to help...but this is a good reminder to show them and tell them!

(Although, this must be done carefully. I can only imagine how alarming it would be for someone to hear me say, "Oh, and by the way, should you ever need to move a body for any reason at all, I'm your girl." That would be weird, right?) :)