Tuesday, March 9, 2010

I Just Wanna Say To All Bystanders...

That I will never roll my eye's at a young mom in the check out lane.

Never!

Shopping is never an easy thing with kids. And when I say shopping, I mean throwing things in the cart/stroller at random while trying to tame my many small children. With multiples, and in our case multiple multiples, my #1 goal in any store, is to just survive. I've got 1 hanging on the end of the stroller, 1 crying, 1 sleeping, and 2 fighting over a coloring book that we're not even buying. I'm checking my list, and I'm begging them to behave. After all, we are in public.

As I'm scanning down my list, I'm asking myself, "what can we do without…what items are not worth another multiple meltdown?" I know, you've been there right? Pleeaase tell me you've been there.

I announce that we are leaving, and to my surprise, they are equally as upset about leaving as they are about being there in the first place. Strange, aren't they? Very cute, but very hard to please at times. I guess the popcorn euphoria had worn off, and I have no more tricks up my sleeve. It's time to make an exit, fast. The shopping trip is over, no matter what we are leaving without. We are check-out bound.

Why do I have to deal with the woman behind me huffing and puffing because my kids are pulling candy off the shelves, and asking for just "one more fing!"

I tell you, mothers - I refuse to huff and puff when my kids are grown.

I want to say to her, "remember when you were (kinda) in my shoes, and apologizing for everything your kids were doing?"

You don't? Well I will.

I will offer a hand, instead of an annoying glare. I will never say, "are they all yours!?"
I will never ask if you had fertility treatment. Your ovulation is your business. Sheesh.
"You know how to stop that, right!?", will never come out of my mouth!

These kiddos are a blessing. That they are God's Grace in my life. An actual picture of His love. Thankyouverymuch.

I will look back and be thankful that I squeezed my little ladies every chance I got. I will be thankful that I didn't let bystanders useless comments get to me.

I'm over you, bystanders!

I'm over the fact that you think these little angels are an inconvenience. I'm not going to worry about one of my Little's asking how old you are, or why you have sandals on when there is snow on the ground. They're kids...they are curious!

I'll never come by a set of multiples and ask 100 questions while I ignore the singleton standing there. Do you not see this eager, sweet, little 5yr old standing here? I will make a big deal about the "singleton." After all, they are our helpers...she, is often my sanity.

So don't worry. If I see you in the store and your kids are opening every door in the freezer section...I will smile.

And maybe laugh.

I will always remember these sweet, crazy days - here in the trenches of motherhood.

26 comments:

Delena said...

Great words! I think we can all relate to a time when we got "the looks" or something of the sort. Hope this post isn't b/c of a bad day at Target. :(

peapodsquadmom said...

oh my dear, dear friend. i have sooo been there. it makes me nuts. when i'm OBVIOUSLY struggling to get out of the store alive, i do NOT want to answer intimate questions about my reproductive style. and for the love of all things sane, stop asking me if they are all identical! one is a girl. we could strip them naked and let you figure it out if it weren't so doggone cold!

Rae said...

Amen sister! Keep preaching. I LOVE this post.

Jenn @ A Country Girl's Ramblings said...

Why are some people SO clueless?

Great post, by the way!

Miss said...

WOO HOO to you lady! I love it!

I will do all the same things! Its a pact!

Lenae said...

I don't have multiples, but oh man, have I been getting the looks at the store lately. Yeesh. Note to self: Don't be that way when my kids are grown! Thanks for this post: It's nice to know that I'm not alone and that someday, I'll do better than others when it comes to this.

A little piece of 7th heaven said...

Well said girlfriend...
Why if you have more than 2.5 kids you are either nuts or a saint.
I HATE it just as much when people look at me and revere me as some saint b/c I have 5 kids or b/c every time one outgrows babyhood I have another...I am either looked at like I am NUTS or am a SAINT..
to which I am NEITHER!!
I am in on your pact:)

Katie@The Baby Factory said...

Here, here! You deserve a nap and some chocolate, my friend :)
One of these days we will wish that we could have it all back.....someday. *sigh*

Katy and Ross said...

Excellent! I can't believe that anybody would ever think those 5 cute faces are any type of a burden! It's a blessing!

bass family said...

Love it. I identify with every part. Especially about the singleton. My sweet Maggie is the best big sister ever. But so overlooked, especially since most people mistake our littlest three for triplets.

Jennifer said...

Thank you! Thank you! I just found you through peapodsquadmom and will be subscribing. Your post didn't make me laugh, it made me cry because that's the kind of mom I want to be too, someday.

We had to wait an extra 10 minutes at yesterday's shopping trip for my angry 18mo to stop throwing groceries out of the cart.

Anonymous said...

Love this post! You certainly are not alone in the check out lane!! Why in the world do they have to put every piece of candy and toys right there where the kids can grab it and fight over it???? Its one of the hardest places to keep it all together and unload the groceries!!

And yes, when I'm older and the kids are grown, I'll be the first to entertain the kids in front of me or tell the mother that she is doing a great job!

Julia

Laurel said...

Oh friend ... I will NEVER forget those times ... and I will NEVER do unto others what was done unto me.

When I see the overwhelmed Mamas shopping, I smile ... I may mention that their children are blessings ... I may tell them, "I remember when ..." But, I will NEVER give more attention to "the twins", nor will I give more attention to the "dark colored adopted children". (You can't believe how invisible my white children have become the past 2 years.)

mama of a dozen plus :)

Marisa said...

Right on! Even though I only have 2 to keep in line I sometimes feel like I have the craziest 2 in the store... but i wouldn't trade them for anything! It's hard to understand why some people would be so judgmental towards parents who are trying to do their best.

Jessica said...

This is such a great post!! I don't have multiples...but I have still had those days! I was actually in Target (I share your love:-)!!) last week while my babes were in school..and I actually helped a ladt in the checkout line by talking to her two older girls (and keeping them in the check out lane) while she tended to her two little screaming ones :). Moms need to help each other out!!

Rana said...

This post was great! This kind of thing always seems to happen to me when we are in Target. It's like that store has bad JuJu or something. I feel ya!

Elizabeth said...

I had a great convo at shopping last week. A lady had 3 little ones and the oldest was a boy about 4 years old who was very "busy". I told her my baby was just like that (all boys are busy) and now he is a beautiful 13 year old. Everyone else in line was scowling ! I hope I made her day better.
Great post.

Faith said...

Oh yeah, I hear you. My kids can go CRAZY in the store and what's up with them pitching a fit on the way out the door?!

Amy said...

DITTO to everything that has been said!!!

..Soo.See.. said...

I happen to find you through BlogHer today and HAD to comment to say thank you and I will so be there with you in the future! Great post!

The Sneaky Mommy said...

Oh, I could just hug you! I know, awkward, we've never met...I have a 6 six year old girl and 4 year old twin boys and think I have lived every comment, look, situation that you just described! I appreciate you acknowledging the lack of attention for the singleton! She is my sanity...and my frills, polka dots, hearts, and all things pink! I love your blog! I'll be back! :)

Lisa said...

Amen! Been there, done that!

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This Heavenly Life said...

You are the best. I'm almost clapping, over here. Definitely nodding.

Let's sign a pact not to be huffy old women, K?

heather@it'stwinsanity said...

Yes, yes, YES!!! Well said.

:)

susan said...

KATE... you ROCK with this post!!!!!! as a mother to six, including two 14 month olds, five boys and a teenage daughter... I So totally get what you are saying.....

bystanders.... I'd appreciate a smile, a kind look that shows you know I'm trying really hard.

I actually had a delightful lady stop me the other day and offer to help push my shopping trolley to the car. She said she was the eldest of 13 children and she just knew it was the right thing to do, to offer a hand. I declined as I was truly fine but I did laugh and say "you can come home and unpack it all with me??" What a sweet lady.

Kate, bravo. Bystanders... boo.

:):)