It's after bedtime here, and the house is sorta quiet.
This little guy is all congested still so I plan on snuggling with him often throughout the night tonight...
Having 6 kids keeps me busy. I mean, real busy. Busier than I ever imagined. And lately I have let myself get so tired, maxed out, and sometimes frozen by what all lays ahead in one single day.
Whew, it feels good to say that out loud.
Motherhood in general is just...busy. It's hard (but rewarding) work.
It's like 1000 jobs shoved into one title, isn't it? There's not one class I took in college that could've prepared me for this line of work - only He can prepare me, and yet He also will walk me through at the same time.
From sun up to sun down, around the clock, 24 hours a day, I (and most of you) am a mom. It's a wonderful job but comes with feelings of self-doubt, pressure, overwhelming moments, and times when I feel like my plate is so full I can hardly see over the top.
It makes me feel anxious sometimes - like I can't keep up, like I'm losing myself in this calling, and like I'm not making a difference in these little lives.
That's a lie, I know.
I am completely convinced that while motherhood fills your heart to the brim with a love you didn't know existed - it is a calling to make you more holy, more like Him, and more dependant on Him.
We tackle the laundry, trim fingernails, work on homework, wipe noses, kiss boo-boo's, break up fights, feed the masses, and some of us even fish Disney Princesses out of the toilet.
We try to do it all.
It's easy to find myself at the end of the day with my face in my hands asking, "how is this crazy, confusing, work-in-progress-mom gig glorifying to Him? How is this making a Kingdom difference?"
The days I feel like that the most are the days I try to cram to much into. It's a habit, I guess. I am guilty of often committing to too much.
But lately He has been reminding me of some things...